Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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