But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
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