she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Randomize
