just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Randomize
