half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
Someone came in the potted fern
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
