at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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