My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
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