I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
Randomize
