Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
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