he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Randomize
