we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
Barsexuality is the new black.
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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