Texts From Last Night

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  (248): View more from Michigan

  I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time

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  (248): I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time http://tfl.nu/04o8
  Replies (7) Good night (1084) Bad night (3454)
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  (706): View more from Georgia

  Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.

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  (706): Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus. http://tfl.nu/wtrd
  Replies (16) Good night (1059) Bad night (3719)
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  (309): View more from Illinois

  I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me

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  (309): I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me http://tfl.nu/z5uh
  Replies (5) Good night (1296) Bad night (2672)
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.

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  (201): Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom. http://tfl.nu/isil
  Replies (20) Good night (1729) Bad night (2977)
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  (810): View more from Michigan

  you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".

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  (810): you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here". http://tfl.nu/11k9
  Replies (5) Good night (2559) Bad night (1028)
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  (928): View more from Arizona

  He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero

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  (928): He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero http://tfl.nu/1qw2
  Replies (6) Good night (805) Bad night (2372)
• Favorite

  (707): View more from California

  You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."

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  (707): You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever." http://tfl.nu/rkii
  Replies (5) Good night (935) Bad night (610)
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  (708): View more from Illinois

  we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.

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  (708): we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now. http://tfl.nu/89m6
  Replies (5) Good night (2870) Bad night (581)
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  (540): View more from Virginia

  I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking

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  (540): I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking http://tfl.nu/y8vi
  Replies (1) Good night (703) Bad night (454)
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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.

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  (608): I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich. http://tfl.nu/h4vr
  Replies (3) Good night (373) Bad night (817)
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  (369): View more from California

  I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.

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  (369): I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter. http://tfl.nu/wfue
  Replies (4) Good night (1215) Bad night (405)
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  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.

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  (918): Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up. http://tfl.nu/f8tw
  Replies (6) Good night (814) Bad night (542)
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  (254): View more from Texas

  Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.

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  (254): Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS. http://tfl.nu/4s6u
  Replies (0) Good night (613) Bad night (323)
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  (613): View more from Ontario

  He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....

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  (613): He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad.... http://tfl.nu/p0ok
  Replies (3) Good night (396) Bad night (850)
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  (949): View more from California

  There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.

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  (949): There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain. http://tfl.nu/am0u
  Replies (0) Good night (597) Bad night (291)

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