Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
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It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
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He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
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