i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
Randomize
