i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
Randomize
