I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Randomize
