Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
