Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
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I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
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