Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
