And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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