Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
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