i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
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