i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
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