just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
Randomize
