what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
Randomize