Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
