He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
Randomize
