I'm going to jail i love you
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
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