My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
What a fucking waste of an outfit
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
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