ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
