i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
Randomize