it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I really wish I could go back in time to change the course of events that led to me sitting on the internet at 3 Googling 'Traumatic masturbation' while talking to you about failed dates, and running a virtual restaurant in a video game.
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
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