did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
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We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
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I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Randomize