So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
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He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
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