it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
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