I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Randomize
