am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Randomize