In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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