If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
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