kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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