Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Randomize
