I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
No subtext here. People are naked.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
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