I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Randomize