My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
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