Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
