I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
Randomize
