There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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