sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
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just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
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He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
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