yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
Randomize
