3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize
