I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Randomize